How I Wish You Were Here

i was jus watchin My girl2..i love that movie for many reasons.And then the old fears came back, wat if i cant love my kids wen i hav my own? wat if i get tired of them jus like i get tired of people easily? wat if i cant feel anything for them?
Im the most unfeeling person i think..n wat if i carry that attitude to my kids?
Wat am i searching for?

I think i wanna feel.Maybe ive wanted to be numb earlier and now wen i am, i wanna feel something.Or maybe i never really ever felt anyhting,but jus pretended to cos i was so scared that i am unable to feel.
See, all my earlier relationships have been only bout the initial rush.Maybe i expect too much from people and relationships including my family. i want them behave in the manner i believe apt.which is y i am dissapointed in everybody.
Since its christmas lets talk bout god.My relationship wit god has been pretty much the same.I expect him to be just and fair and all that stuff, but as i figure if we wer made in his image he cant be too perfect.Did i give up on god cos he doesn behave the way i want him to? not exactly.Givin room for error i jus expected him to do FEW things rite...
But the master of puppets is on a high this season,ladies and gentlemen, sit tight.

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here.

- 'Wish You Were Here',Deep purple

(Ooops My bad- its Pink Floyd.)